I Have No Plot But I Know Which Groceries These Characters Would Buy: A Tale of Misplaced Priorities
The more I think about it, the more I believe that the entire Pokemon world lived in a perpetual state of “Is Sycamore even real tho?”
(This joke has been done at least 800 times, but I’m self-indulgent trash and needed to do it myseeeelf)
why am i not the protagonist of an amazing story
you are though—its called your life
shut the fuck up i wanna struggle fighting demons not struggle with getting out of bed every day
but those are your demons
i am hereby naming you as the antagonist and now it is my sole job to find you and hit you in the face with a chair for that bitch ass comment you just made
I’ve never met Chris Pratt but I trust him
I would be stuck wearing a yellow jumpsuit made of duct tape and velcro and goddamn it my allmate would be a fucking fish and this is incredibly inconvenient because every time I need a traffic update, I need to be carrying around this goddamn fish bowl like a jackass. Also everyone is gay and off galavanting and here I am with nothing to do except live in poverty and avoid Rib teams lest they kill me for no reason.
What a great life.
Better get my shit packed for Hogwarts the train leaves tomorrow
"What does that even mean!??"
It means exactly what you think. BV
She gets to have two hot daddies and a hot mama~
the last one killed me
my brother tried to pick up a banana to make it look like he was talking on the phone but all the bananas in the bunch came with it and he just looked at me and went “i guess it’s a conference call”
don’t encourage him